Well if I'm not the worst blog updater ever I don't know who is! As far as the six month time span from my last post goes... I hope you're all doing well! Still reading and writing yes?
I've decided to get a little more personal and start sharing short stories of mine. And heck this is a blog about a writing journal... There needs to be some real writing in here!
This one is a bit dark. If any of you read my first books from Bloodlines you'll know I'm kind of just creepy like that. Enjoy!
Behind Every Door
By Taylor Lee
Little Lucy could see. More than her nanny could see, more than her own mother could see, and more than anyone present at the funeral could see. Lucy’s father recently passed away. Dark whispers gossiped of murder and ill intent. No one would tell Lucy the details of course; she was only nine years old. They didn’t want to frighten her more.
Lucy’s family was very wealthy and lived in a handsome home out in the country away from busy cities, and in the back of their large property was a family cemetery. The father was buried in crypt amongst his other ancestors. Assuming all cemeteries to be gloomy or unsettling, this one was beautiful, at least to Lucy. All her life she’d played in this yard, tombstones and all. All around was lush and green even amidst the dead there was life in the flowers and trees surrounding the property. The sun would enhance all the colors and ambiance of the country scenery. But even the comforting beauty was damaged by the death of Lucy’s father. Lucy could almost hear the trees whispering with the rest of her family. The lovely daisies even drooped down at the soil.
Lucy’s nanny, Mags, comforted Lucy by stroking her long curly blonde hair. Lucy’s nanny was actually named Maggie, but ever since Lucy was a baby she’s always called her Mags for short. Lucy’s actual mother was usually very busy with her and her husband’s social status and other duties rich people had. Now Papa was gone, dead, and Lucy’s mother had a lost look about her.
The funeral ended, and slowly people left to go into the house for continuous adult chatter. Lucy stayed outside to lie in the cool grass and ponder about what was happening. Mags sat next to her for a while, until someone from inside the house called her in for something important. Now it was just Lucy and her thoughts. The little girl shut her eyes and felt the wind blow around her making the trees restless and stealing some of their leaves.
“Why did you leave, Papa?” Lucy asked to the nothingness.
At that exact moment, there was silence. It was so quiet that Lucy had to open her eyes and sat up in confusion. The trees stopped moving, and the grass stood so still she thought it could be made of crystal or glass, not even the birds chirped. This made Lucy uncomfortable and she felt her heart beating in alarm. Hopefully it was nothing and she would snap out of it any second, but she did not. The silence stood firm.
Then finally there was a sound. It was a hollow knocking that echoed loudly, like someone beating on a large door with nothing behind it. Lucy whirled around. Nothing except for the faded cream-colored walls of the house and the small black door that led to the basement.
The knocking continued. How strange, Lucy thought. She stood up on her little chicken legs, rubbing some dirt off her frilly dress, and approached the basement door. A knock came again, and it sounded like it came from the other side, but who could it be? The knock came one more time and then stopped, waiting. The unknown nudged Lucy until she was grazing the door with her tiny fingertips. Lucy placed one hand on the knob and turned.
The door made no noise whatsoever, but she could hear a loud breeze coming from behind it. Peculiar, her basement shouldn’t have a breeze or wind flow at all. Beyond the door was definitely not her normal basement. It was a mirror image of where she lived only it was dark and destroyed. Where her house should be was half rubble and half blackened bricks that were falling apart. All the windows were destroyed and the roof was no longer there. As for the rest of the supposedly beautiful yard was just black dirt and withering trees that were burnt to a crisp but still aflame. The fire made tiny cackling as twigs died off and plummeted to the ground. The sky was clouded and threatened rain and lightning, but instead left faint wads of ash that pilled around like snow.
Lucy stepped back from the horrid scene and looked away back at behind the doorway. Her house was still there and so were the flowers and the trees weren’t charcoal. Then why was it so ugly looking when she looked through the doorway? She felt the need to explore, but before she went through the doorway she grabbed a big rock to hold the door open.
It was quite chilly in this place, not freezing just that stage that’s at the border of uncomfortable. Everything looked disturbed, and it smelt like smoke and muck.
Beyond the house appeared to be just wasteland, continuous wasteland. She almost turned around and went back to her normal home after feeling eerie and disinterested, when she heard something. It sounded like a woman’s voice coming from inside the house, and it sounded like someone she knew. From the woman’s tone, stubborn and strong, the voice could only belong to Lucy’s mother. She couldn’t quite hear what her mother was saying, so she scampered inside for a closer look.
“Mama?” Lucy called out. The house was as awful on the inside as it was on the outside. All burnt and black and dirty, much unlike her normal home which mother slaves Mags to clean everyday. The big staircase was falling apart and looked very dangerous to climb, but mother’s voice was coming from the second floor. How did Mama get in here anyways, Lucy wondered.
Lucy attempted the hazardous staircase. The snowy-white, soft carpet was torn and grayed and chunks of wood that used to be part of the steps were now missing and splinters escaped the cavities. She made it up the stairs unscratched and managed to only make one step creak and threaten to collapse. Mama’s voice was louder now, and it was coming from Papa’s old library. Lucy trotted down the hallway until she entered the large room she used to love so much. Papa would take Lucy to the library all the time to read night stories. It was wall-to-wall books on elegant wooden shelves and Papa’s favorite red velvety couch. When Lucy entered the room, her heart sank to see most of the books were missing and the couch was tattered. In the middle of the destruction was Mama. She was standing perfectly still just staring at a wall opposite of the doorway.
“Mama?” Lucy called again.
Mama did not respond. Something was off about Mama too, Lucy noticed. Like everything else in this place she looked very dark and sickly. Her skin was chalk white and she was much skinnier than in real life. That golden blonde hair that was always perfectly in a neat bun was now matted and dimmed into a mouse-brown color.
“John.” Mama hissed.
Lucy cringed from how sharp her mother spoke. Never has Lucy ever heard her mother speak harshly, especially when talking about Papa.
“Useless…Ungrateful…” Mama continued to mutter.
“This is not Mama,” Lucy whispered to herself, getting scared.
“No more my dear… no more…” Mama made laughing noises like a hyena.
That was it for Lucy, she turned around and ran down the hallway and almost fell down the broken staircase. There was nothing good about this place, she would never come back, she decided. Heart racing, she made it outside and felt relieved to still see the open door back to the beautiful happy world where Mama would be pretty. But there was something else by the door. Mags.
It was another dark world copycat. Mags wasn’t ever the loveliest woman, but in this world she resembled a homeless person. She looked like she was on the brink of death, bone skinny and draped in brown rags. Her skin was very pale, but covered in the suit that blanketed the ground, and her long brown hair almost swallowed her face completely.
“Mags?” Lucy asked, heart still pounding.
“Hello, Lucy,” Mags spoke.
Mags spoke. Lucy gasped. Mags never spoke, because at least in the real world Mags was a mute. It made life being a nanny difficult, but Lucy always understood Mags and grew to communicate in other ways. Like sign language on occasion, or merely facial expressions.
“You can talk here?” Lucy asked almost smiling.
Mags nodded, “Everyone can talk here Lucy. Here there are no secrets.”
Lucy didn’t know what that meant but she ran up to hug her nanny, “Lets leave here Mags! Come back with me so we can talk.”
Those skinny feeble arms tried to hug Lucy back.
“No Lucy, but will you come visit me again?”
Lucy pouted, “I guess so… Why would you want to stay here? It’s scary”
Mags didn’t respond.
“I saw Mama here too, Mags…But she...”
“Your Mama is not a good lady, Lucy,” Mags mumbled.
“Not good?” Lucy squeaked, “You love Mama, and I love Mama remember?”
Mags again didn’t say anything, but this time she let go of Lucy’s embrace and walked away towards the scary house. Lucy would have pursued her, but she really wanted to get back to her fresh air and clean home to check if it was real.
Her eyes squinted adjusting to the sun again. She took a deep breath and inhaled the aroma of foliage and life.
“Mama!” Lucy came running into the house, her real house. Everything was back in place and not destroyed. She sighed very happy that everything was perfect and wonderful again, except for the fact that Papa was still dead…
Everyone was hanging out in the living room observing old and recent pictures of her Papa. Grandma was crying on Grandpa’s shoulder and a few of Lucy’s aunts and uncles huddled in a circle sharing old memories they had of him. Mama was walking around visiting everyone, shedding a tear or two, and hugging anyone who broke down. She wasn’t ugly anymore and her hair was up and tidy. Almost too tight, Lucy could see the stress wrinkles from the hair pulling too hard away from her face.
“Mama, guess what!” Lucy ran up to her.
Mama jumped, her hands twitched and she scoffed softly, “Not now. Lower your voice, be respectful.”
Lucy wanted to tell someone about this place she found, but then again maybe it was too scary for everyone, or maybe no one would believe her, or maybe it was all her imagination this whole time?
Mags was sitting in a corner holding a picture of Papa.
“Mags…” Lucy whispered this time, “Mags?”
The nanny’s head popped up and she smiled at Lucy. She put down the picture and in sign asked Lucy “How are you?”
“Ok,” Lucy replied, “Mags I found this place where you can talk!”
Mags made an odd giggle and signed again, “Sounds lovely.”
Lucy came over to look at Papa’s picture Mags had. It made Lucy sad knowing Papa wouldn’t be with them anymore. She didn’t like admitting it but she liked Papa more than Mama. Sometimes it seemed Papa liked spending time with Lucy more than Mama too. In fact, Lucy couldn’t remember the last time her Mama spent any real time with her at all.
“Mags, do u think Mama is a good lady?”
Mags face got concerned and she cocked her head in question.
“Do you think she’s bad?” Lucy asked seriously.
Mags shook her head and signed with her hands, “No. Why?”
Lucy shrugged, then why does the scary Mags not think so, she thought to herself.
The gathering lasted another two hours, and as much as Lucy loved Papa, she grew bored. She would rather morn without all the people around, so she ended up playing outside again. The flowers were blooming and colorful today and she picked a few to create her own bouquet. When she got married she would have a bouquet just like this, she thought. She practiced walking down a make-believe isle, humming the wedding song, and then bit her lip remembering her Papa wouldn’t be there. A little tear escaped her eye.
A whisper broke her melancholy, “Lucy?”
Lucy forgot she left the magical door open, and the scary Mags was standing in the doorway.
“There’s so much for you to see Lucy,” Mags said.
“What do you mean? I see just fine,” Lucy laughed.
Mags pointed at Lucy’s house, her real house, “The adults aren’t telling you things, especially your Mama. You don’t like them keeping secrets do you?”
Lucy thought for a moment, it did make her wonder. She plucked the petals off her flowers in deep thought.
“What won’t they tell me?” Lucy asked.
“You can find any answers in here, Lucy. Any secret your Mama has, even secrets I have that we would never tell you out there.”
Lucy had nothing better to do, and Mags was offering her a walk-through diary, so she decided to try going through the doorway of the “basement” again into the dark world. She did not miss this place, but she did like that Mags could speak. It made it easier not trying to remember what every sign means.
Mags pointed towards the ugly house, “Explore, you will find what you want to know, and what you need to know.”
Lucy hesitated, “It’s scary in there, Mags.”
Mags’s cold hand rested on her shoulder, “It can be scary, but you can face it or run away from it. If you run you will never know the secrets.”
Lucy turned to ask Mags to join her so she wouldn’t be as scared, but Mags had disappeared like a ghost. The house looked so uninviting that she instantly regretted coming back, but maybe she would try just once more to find these so called secrets.
She entered the haunting house for the second time today and waited to see if she’d hear her Mama again. When nothing happened Lucy wandered through the rest of the house she hadn’t explored to see if she could find anything interesting. The living room which she was just in a while ago with the funeral gathering taking place was hardly existent. The walls were completely gone so it was a large hole in the house and there was no furniture or people. Dull.
Right as she was about to give up, a thud came from upstairs and she heard two voices. When she listened more carefully they weren’t necessarily talking to each other, but both voices were quite loud.
Lucy braved the staircase again and this time headed to her room. She saw the scary Mags sitting in a corner on the floor talking to no one but the wall.
“Poor girl… Poor Lucy… Poor John… That horrid woman! I hate her,” Mags began to cry.
“Mags? It’s ok…” Lucy came to sooth Mags, but she jumped back, because Mags started breaking the wall with her fist.
“I’m going to take her away… Away from her Mama…” Mags finally cooled off. Her hand was bloody, but she did manage to make a nice hole in the bedroom wall.
Mags saw the blood running down her hand and looked disgusted, and then she saw Lucy and cried again. “Lucy, come with me?”
“Where?” Lucy asked, too perplexed to move.
Mags extended her bloody hand, “Just come with me, Lucy, it’ll be ok I can take care of you. Your Mama doesn’t love you like I do.”
Some of her words hurt Lucy, and she took a step back, “Mama loves me…”
Mags shook her head, still crying, “No Lucy, she’s bad, she doesn’t want you.”
Lucy knew coming here was a mistake now. She ran out of her bedroom and reached the stairs, but forgot how unstable they were. After the first step she heard a loud crunch, and the stairs gave way. Lucy fell through the stairs and into complete darkness. Luckily it wasn’t too far of a drop. She must have landed in the basement, which coincidently was right under the stairs. The air did get knocked out of her as she hit the cold cement. There wasn’t much light down here besides from the new hole where the stairs were, and she did spot a dim glow from candles. She knew that that’s where the stairs up to the kitchen were, but she could also tell that she was not alone. A cold shiver crawled down her spine as she saw the outline of her Mama.
“John, John, John…” Mama’s voice cooed.
Lucy wanted to cry, but didn’t want to make any noise either. She continued to watch Mama, who was moving around and it sounded like she was carrying heavy objects. Finally she stopped, and all the sudden the basement lights turned on. Alarmed, Lucy saw on every wall of the basement were large blow-up pictures of her Papa. Mama walked in slow circles observing one picture in particular. It was the picture of Mama and Papa’s wedding day.
“John…John…you don’t even suspect…” Mama chanted, “I’m going to get you good darling…” Then her psychotic howling boomed and echoed in the basement and the pictures trembled. Lucy crawled to hide behind some rubble and waited for Mama to move away from the kitchen stairway.
Mama drew a large knife from her dress sleeve and stabbed Papa’s face in the wedding picture, laughing louder and louder. One wasn’t enough, so Mama continued to stab and carve another picture of Papa too. Lucy sprinted for the stairway, feeling her heart wanting to leap out of her chest.
She escaped up the stairs and bolted through the kitchen door and gasped. Her Mama was in the kitchen too. She was boiling a pot of tea, or at least trying to, but there was nothing workable in the broken kitchen. Mama poured the murky clumpy looking tea into two small chipped cups and giggled.
“One for daddy…one for baby… She looks too much like you dear…Little Lucy you always loved her more than me…You can have her!”
Mama took the teacups and threw them against the wall. Instantly the tea burned through the wall like acid. Lucy was frozen in terror. Slowly, her Mama turned her head and spotted Lucy. Her eyes had no life, just black pits in her face like marbles.
Lucy screamed, and ran. Ran until she reached the magical door between worlds, and once she reached that door she removed the rock she placed to keep it open and let the door shut. This time it would be shut for good.
She ran inside her house to find Mags, the real Mags. She was still sitting in her corner looking at more pictures.
“Mags… What happened to Papa?” Lucy asked, out of breath.
Mags looked worried and signed, “He died.”
Lucy choked back tears, “Don’t lie to me Mags… What happened?”
There was silence in the room. Many people had left, but most of the close family was still there and they watched Lucy in wonder.
Mags looked around for anyone to answer Lucy, but no one did, so she signed, “Possibly poison.”
Lucy nodded, tears coming down her face, “You know who did it too don’t you.”
Mags let her mouth drop and she looked startled. Grandpa came up from behind Lucy and patted her head, “We’re all very upset about your Papa’s passing, Lucy, but no one knows anything for certain.”
Just then Mama walked in looking sweet and definitely not sinister. “Thank you all for coming, I’m sure John felt very loved today by his wonderful family… He will be in our hearts, if any of you need anything we’ll all be here for each other,” she said kindly.
With that the family left, everyone except Grandma and Grandpa. Mags took Lucy to the kitchen to make her a cheese sandwich. Lucy ate in silence, still not sure what to think of everything. Mags remained silent, more silent than she usually is and left to go tend to Lucy’s laundry.
Mama came in, smiled at Lucy, and started warming some tea over the stove. Something in the back of Lucy’s mind wanted to start running and screaming, but she told herself it was nothing.
“How are you dear?” Mama asked.
Lucy didn’t want to believe Mama was bad, but what if? Or maybe this was all in her head.
“I miss Papa,” Lucy said quietly.
Mama nodded, “Of course you do... Want some tea?”
Lucy didn’t say anything. Mama went to grab some cups from a cabinet. Her hands twitched again, and placed the cups sloppily on the counter next to Lucy. Then she came over and gave Lucy a hug.
“Mama loves you,” she cooed.
There was something very wrong about this embrace. Lucy couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but the feelings were off. This made Lucy shiver in discomfort, and Mama finally let her go.
“Maggie?” Mama called for the nanny, “I’m going to tend to John’s parents, could u please give Lucy her tea?”
There was no sound of reply, but Mama knew Mags heard her. Mama left the room to probably say her farewells to Grandma and Grandpa, and Mags walked in glumly. Her eyes were wide as if afraid of something, but her body was slumped and weak looking.
“What’s wrong, Mags?” Lucy asked.
Mags stopped by the pot of hot water and the teacups. She was concentrating intensely on the cups as if looking for something in particular.
“Mags?” Lucy asked again.
Still Mags was unresponsive. Then, so quickly and abruptly that it made Lucy jump, Mags grabbed one of the cups and held it to her nose. And just as suddenly, the nanny’s lip quivered and her eyes began to water.
Lucy came over to tend to her Mags and pulled on her dress, “I’m sad too, Mags.”
Mags shook her head and with shaking hands, signed, “You don’t…”
“I don’t?” Lucy asked, confused, “I don’t what?”
The nanny tried to steady her hands as she signed, “Know.”
“Maggie?”
It was Mama, and she was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, arms folded, “You haven’t given Lucy her tea…why not?”
Mags glared at Mama, and then Lucy absolutely knew something was amiss. She tried remembering her adventures in the magical door that showed her a darker version of her world. Maybe it means something, she thought, something important. What was it that the scary Mags said? There are no secrets here… You can find any answers in here, Lucy. Any secret your Mama has, even secrets I have that we would never tell you out there… And what were the answers Lucy found? She tried remembering, but the only thing that came to her mind was how insane and frightening everyone was.
Lucy looked at the teacups, and remembered how deranged Mama had been in the other world, and how she poured tea saying, “One for daddy…one for baby… She looks too much like you dear…Little Lucy you always loved her more than me…you can have her!”
Nightmares were becoming reality. Mags had earlier signed to Lucy, “Possibly poison.” Now Mags was thoroughly examining Lucy’s cup of tea, and it looked like she found what she was looking for.
“You trying to poison me too, Mama?” Lucy said grimly.
No one said a word. The room was as silent as Papa’s corpse. Mama fixed her eyes on Lucy, her face turning pale white and her lip tightening, “Now why would you say that, dear.”
Mags put a hand on Lucy’s shoulder, this made Lucy feel much better, but nothing could scare her more than knowing her own Mama killed Papa. Her eyes started watering and her body shook uncontrollably.
“WHY DID YOU KILL PAPA!” Lucy shouted desperately and loudly enough for her grandparents to hear.
Lucy hid under the covers of her bed and cried. She knew the truth, Mama must have poisoned Papa, but no one would believe it. Only Mags believed, but she was mute no one took her seriously. Now what would happen to them?
After Lucy lashed out on Mama in the kitchen, Grandpa came running in to pull her away. Lucy couldn’t understand why he would want to protect Mama. He took Lucy up to her bedroom and tried calming her, “I know this is hard, Lucy.” Why couldn’t anyone see that Mama was bad?
Lucy hadn’t left her room for hours, and it was near midnight now. Grandpa had stayed over to comfort Mama, but something even more terrible happened. Lucy heard Mama and Grandpa talking outside her door a while earlier about what had happened.
“It’s the nanny,” Mama whispered sharply, “She’s filling Lucy’s head with stories and lies! That women wants to take everything from me.”
“Now you think the nanny killed my son? We can’t continue to keep accusing each other,” Grandpa replied sternly.
“Oh yeah?” Mama snapped, “Then what’s this?”
Lucy couldn’t see what she had handed to Grandpa, but she could guess what it was by the sound of Grandpa sniffing and the sound of him clicking glass. The teacup.
“She tried giving that to Lucy…Who’s to say she didn’t give it to John too?”
After that, Lucy couldn’t hear them anymore. This world might look prettier than the dark work behind the magical door, but it felt just as cold and ugly and evil. How was everyone was able to hide malice so well, Lucy pondered.
Someone pulled on Lucy’s blankets, and Lucy almost yelped in fear, but it was only Mags.
“Mags!” Lucy threw herself at her nanny and continued to cry. Mags hugged Lucy tightly to her and almost began crying herself, but she stayed strong and pulled Lucy away so that she’d be able to sign.
“Come away with me.”
Lucy frantically brushed her tears away to see better, “Away where?”
Mags shrugged, “I have family in a wonderful city very far away from here, Mama does not know,” Mags signed quickly, “We can be safe there for a long time.”
“Won’t you get in trouble? Mama is telling on you Mags, but I know you’re good... What’s happening?” Lucy asked.
Mags sighed deeply and signed, “They will blame me. But I am scared if you stay. Come?”
Lucy knew this was true, her Mama was obviously sick and disturbed and should be locked away, but she wasn’t going to be. Lucy would have to leave a luxurious world and her wealthy family, but the only place she found peace was with Mags.
Lucy practiced her own sign language that consisted with a simple nod.
